February 13, 2011

Love actually


Love. I'll bet if you ask all your friends what their definition of love is, they'd each say something slightly different. But one thing we can all agree upon is that it begins with a feeling. Something about this person makes them stand out from the others you've met. Something about them makes you want to share what precious time you have with them, to learn more, to share more, to laugh more. Some love stories are sweeping epics, spanning years with volumes of memories. Some love stories are fleeting, but no less full of love. Last year several people I know ended up getting divorced. Their love stories all started the same - full of bliss, hope and mutual adoration. They all had happy photos on their mantles at one point. Somewhere along the road, either they changed or their paths diverted away from one another. What makes me sad is hearing their stories of how they "stayed in it for the kids" or "stayed in it too long because they didn't want to be alone." You only have one shot at this life - make sure you're in a relationship because you truly want to be in it. Don't look back on your life and think, well, I stayed unhappy for 10 years to keep my children's lives stable. What does that teach them? Remember on airplanes they always say that in the event of an emergency, you have to put on your oxygen mask before helping others. You are no good to anyone unless you look after yourself first. Who wants miserable parents? I'm not an expert on love, and frankly I don't know anyone who is, but there are a few simple truths about love that I have learned over the years. Of those I know, the ones with the happiest relationships are people who share deeply compatible friendships. You have to have stuff in common that you enjoy, or else what fun are you having together? Lust fades, so you better have something solid to back it up. Don't get me wrong, there's still lots of great sex to be had, but that got-to-have-you-right-this-second-on-this-uncomfortable-tabletop only lasts so long - or else we'd never get anything done! Another simple truth about love -the more you put into it, the more you will get out of it. But that's a golden rule for most things in life. There are just a few questions you have to ask yourself - do they make your heart happy? Do you enjoy your time with them more than your time away from them? Are they the first person you would call if: you had amazing news to share, or if you won two tickets to a romantic destination, or if you were upset? And most importantly, are they worthy of your heart? Are you proud of who they are as a person?

There have been so many wonderful love stories captured on film. A few of my all time favourites are: Out of Africa, When Harry Met Sally, The Notebook, Walk the Line....but the little piece of film footage that I think best sums up love is this four minute montage from Up. Please click here and enjoy! xo 

2 comments:

Kimberly Noll said...

That montage from Up is so sweet and reminded me of when I saw it. Up was released about when my mom passed away. My sister and I saw it and thought it had a great message for my dad who was struggling. We explained the plot to him and suggested he see it. His reaction to the plot: "there are talking dogs?!?". I laugh every time I think about it.

kelly said...

Thanks Kim, that's one of those laugh through tears kind of moments.