Approximately once a week, local moms and I get together with our little ones so they can play and we can have some highly appreciated mom-to-mom conversation. Our children were all roughly born a month apart, and with everyone's maternity leaves drawing to a close, anxiety is definitely on the rise as moms are preparing to return to work. I've seen a lot of teary eyed moms discuss their heartbreak over the impending changes. Some moms have decided to walk away from successful careers, choosing to stay at home during these early years. They have downsized from houses to apartments as a temporary living solution to cut their budgets. Some moms are choosing to return to work for financial or professional reasons. Some parents thrive on the balance of mixing a career and family. There is no right or wrong solution. There are definitely strong opinions on this topic, but I honestly think whatever works for your family is what you need to do. I've heard some women say that they are stay at home moms because they don't want strangers raising their children. While that is a nice sentiment, a lot of families can't afford to have one parent stay at home. Also, some parents just aren't built to be at home full time. Parents are found in every demographic and what works for one, definitely might not work for another.
If you are returning to work, one of the most challenging decisions is childcare. Do you go with a professionally run group daycare? Do you choose a daycare run in a family home? Do you choose a daycare close to where you live or close to where you work? Do you hire a nanny to take care of your child in your home? Do you nanny-share? Do you have relatives that can help out? There are so many alternatives, it can be overwhelming.
Personally, I visited a lot of daycares run in family homes and a few group daycares. Each time I came home from interviewing a daycare, I cried. Don't get me wrong, I saw some amazing places run by very nurturing caregivers. Unfortunately, the one I liked the best would require me working full time just to afford to send her to it. It had yoga classes, art classes, state of the art classrooms, amazing playgrounds and an in house chef. Yes, you read that right, a chef. By the end of the tour I am pretty sure I signed myself up for it.
I think I found the process of looking for childcare so gut-wrenching because I wanted to be a mom for so long, and now that I finally am one, the thought of missing out on all the little nuances of her days overwhelmed me. It was easy to realize after looking at her photos from the past year, that this period of life goes by so incredibly quickly and my time with her is something I value more than anything. We reviewed our budget and realized that if we made a few simple sacrifices, we could swing things if I wanted to work part time. I am beyond thrilled that my employer was able to accommodate my request. And because it is only a few days a week, Stella's grandmas offered to take care of her while I work. For me, it is ideal being able to have a mix of worklife and quality time with her. I hope the transition goes smoothly (ie I hope my brain doesn't explode when I return to work). Did you find the adjustment tough? What was your ideal solution for your family? xo
