This weekend our friends surprised us with a baby shower. I was completely shocked. Our friend Tabb, who hails from Virginia, invited the gang over for a traditional American Thanksgiving feast. So, when we walked in and saw their place decorated with baby stuff, I burst into tears. The support and kindness that we have been shown throughout this process has been absolutely amazing. I've learned so much from our friends, their experiences in parenthood, their amazing skill sets, their suggestions, their heartfelt enthusiasm. It's getting so close and yet I don't feel quite ready. I mean technically, we're ready. The room is set up. We've been generously inundated with gifts, clothes, supplies, everything a little bean could possibly need. From a position of "stuff", we're definitely ready. But on Friday night, while out walking the dog, I turned to Craig and just teared up. It suddenly occurred to me that for 17 years, it's been about us, just us. And I love what we've created together- our love, our friendship, our adventures, our teamwork. Are we really ready to have someone come in and tip that on its side?
I know that life will be different. It will be enriched yet challenging, bigger, yet somehow more insular, it will be everything we dreamt of and yet nothing we could have ever predicted. I know we'll love being parents, we both have wanted this for so long. But now that the due date is just two weeks away, I'm feeling desperate to have a few more romantic dinners, a few more shared moments where we are fully engrossed in each other's company and not distracted, a few more evenings where it's just "us." I guess the fact that the clock is quickly counting down now just makes me sentimental about how lucky we've been to have all of this time together. I hope this new baby loves our little family as much as I do.
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